Andromeda
by reinariel
Summary: AU. Gen. Loop of Death verse. Spoilers for Deemo version 2.0 ending. Spoilers for Deemo and the Little Girl's true identities. After the crash, there's a Hans-shaped hole in Alice's life that can never be filled. This is where it all begins.
**Title:** Andromeda

 **Fandom:** Deemo

 **Summary:** AU. Gen. Loop of Death verse. After the crash, there's a Hans-shaped hole in Alice's life that can never be filled. This is where it all begins.

 **General Warnings:** AU. Gen. Oneshot. Suicide. Angst. Family. Dark thoughts. Spoilers for Deemo version 2.0 ending. Spoilers for the Little Girl and Deemo's true identities. Tell me what other warnings I need to tag/mention.

 **Author's note:** Can anyone guess where the title came from? This was inspired by several conversations with tumblr user yuu33, who dragged me into Deemo hell a few months ago. Not sure if you still like Deemo as much as before but I wanna share this with you since this is supposed to be part of your loop of death verse. So yeah, here's a darker explanation of how Deemo works. Hope you guys enjoy!

* * *

 **1.**

After the accident, whenever Alice closes her eyes, she dreams.

Of gentle fingers brushing her brown hair with the ease of someone who has done it countless times. Of the hands that patch up her bleeding fingers when Alice thoughtlessly grabs a bunch of pretty, thorny cream roses. Those warm hands always effortlessly glide across a row of black and white and create breathtaking music beyond her comprehension.

And yet, as his gentle fingers curl around her waist before the impact hits them both for the nth time, those very hands paint red across her eyelids and inevitably plunges her in a never-ending nightmare.

Alice gasps awake, tears already running down her cheeks. She ignores the sound of her nurse's approaching footsteps as she hastily scans her ward for any signs of life.

She'll take _anything_ ,

 _Please_ , she pleads wordlessly, although she isn't even sure herself to whom she is talking to. _Please give my big brother back to me._

But just like the last time, Hans isn't here when she wakes up.

* * *

 **2.**

The first thing Alice asked after the accident was, "Where is my big brother?"

* * *

 **3.**

"How are you feeling today, Alice?" they said.

The girl doesn't respond, staring blankly out the window, cold fingers hold onto a slightly crumpled piece of paper.

There's no Hans by her bedside today.

"I hate to tell you… but your brother is gone," they said.

No. He _can't_ be gone.

At the back of her mind, she sees cream wool turn red all over again.

...He can't be.

The letter in her lap crumples further.

If- If it's true, then, there's no point in doing anything, is there?

"Hans would want you to move on. To live," they said.

But… how is she supposed to live without him?

Alice barely remembers what her parents looked like. It is always Hans, who cares for her when she falls sick, who makes her lunch to eat at school, who comforts her after she has a nightmare.

Who holds her hand when they cross the road.

(If Alice can turn back time, she will insist on walking without holding hands, using a different route, staying home. Anything. To stop Hans' time from running out, she'll do anything.)

(Why can't Alice save him back then?)

Whenever she closes her eyes, all she can see is red. So much red, it crawls into her throat, blocks her airways, freezes her. It's so cold, she can't breathe.

Hans is all she has.

Without him, Alice is nothing.

* * *

 **4.**

The sounds of weeping reaches her ears.

Alice stares at the casket before her, clad in black. Presses the mostly-white bouquet she made into Hans' cold hands, a splash of red at its centre.

Calla lilies. Carnations. Daisies.

She watches from beneath her black umbrella as the casket is lowered into the ground, her hands fiddling with a single red flower.

Watches as its sister descends with him.

When the rain falls, a part of Alice isn't surprised. Even the skies mourn for the loss of her brother.

* * *

 **5.**

Alice didn't remember how she got up there.

Only that she did, dressed in mostly-white.

* * *

 **6.**

Jumping didn't scare her.

Not when it meant she could see Hans again.

Nothing could scare her more than not having Hans by her side.

(If she could not save him... then she would rather join him.)

* * *

 **7.**

Swirling winds harshly tousles her brown hair, the coldness biting into her cheeks, battering against her thin body as she draws ever-closer to the ground.

Slowly, Alice's eyes slide shut in preparation for the final touch to her own bouquet.

* * *

 **8.**

This is how it all begins, with a strange Little Girl who falls through a window into the gentle arms of a shadowy figure called Deemo, and a world, so fantastical, it is as if it can only exist in dreams.

Neither of them knows of Hans and Alice, until it's too late and everything happens all over again.

 **End**

* * *

 **Fun fact:** More than half of the bouquet is poisonous. Make of that what you will.


End file.
